Catching Up From a Quiet Patch
Nov. 3rd, 2021 10:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
nyykiSorry for the lack of signal, folks, but it's been a bit heavy on the processing lately.
Coming out on ZuckerBook went a lot better than I suspected it would. One friend went away, and I have no idea who it was, so I won't know until they (maybe) ask to re-friend. I'm not judging anyone about this, I know I dropped a lot in one post, so overwhelming is a real possibility.
And speaking of this process, here's this:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/zy8wun1bola766s/Modern%20Nicole%20by%20tree%20Waist%20up%20looking%20down%20%28Best%29.JPG?dl=0
I'm processing the reactions I've gotten about this shot. Self-concept is a complex thing, and hearing words I never associated with myself showing up a bunch of times makes me want to figure out what's getting this reaction. But I can't see it to know on an emotional level what this picture looks like. So I either have to decide that these words don't apply to me or work to find room for them in my psyche. Add to that how these are words so tied up in my gender identification and how vast a time it's been where that's been a core thing. So not only do I not identify as beautiful, gorgeous, or lovely, but I felt and thought I couldn't ever be identified as those things. It's kind of a massive hump to get over, but It's something I know I have to deal with.
In other news, Magnets and Ladders published two of my short stories in their Fall/Winter 2021/22 issue. One of them, "Before the Fall", won their fiction category. They're at www.magnetsandladders.org and I like what they're doing.
One of my big concerns is that I'm not writing near as much short fiction. That may be because I'm writing massive novels right now. Holly and the Wizards is at 774 pages, and it's got a lot more ground to cover. But yesterday I was in a conversation on ZB about a band I like a whole lot, Porcupine Tree, and we were comparing them without their current drummer and after he joined them. So I heard one of their songs twice, and the first two lines grabbed my imagination. An hour later I had a story of around 1500 words, spell-checked, proofed, and edited multiple times. times. Okay, it's been more of an issue of what I've been focusing on. That's heartening. I'm running out of shorter length stuff to submit to Magnets and Ladders.
Speaking of creative endeavors, I've managed to do something I've been wanting to do for a while. I've got a song with echo parts built in, so they track with a change in speed and lock to the pulse of the song. But I've wanted something extra, so I've got them bouncing around in the stereo field, independent of each other, and it creates a nice cloud or halo effect where the tracks seem to surround the listener. This isn't what I thought it would sound like, but I consider it to be both a lucky accident and also appropriate to the track. And I love being able to play in this kind of sandbox.
It's all about creativity for me. I've figured out that creativity is one of the sexiest things to me, though it doesn't seem to show up in who I dated in the past. Of course that's been a touch over 18% of my life, so I may be forgetting some things about them.
So that's it in a nutshell. I have several things I want to post here, so it's a matter of writing them and getting them put up. Hope y'all are doing well.
Nyyki (she/her/Miss)
Coming out on ZuckerBook went a lot better than I suspected it would. One friend went away, and I have no idea who it was, so I won't know until they (maybe) ask to re-friend. I'm not judging anyone about this, I know I dropped a lot in one post, so overwhelming is a real possibility.
And speaking of this process, here's this:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/zy8wun1bola766s/Modern%20Nicole%20by%20tree%20Waist%20up%20looking%20down%20%28Best%29.JPG?dl=0
I'm processing the reactions I've gotten about this shot. Self-concept is a complex thing, and hearing words I never associated with myself showing up a bunch of times makes me want to figure out what's getting this reaction. But I can't see it to know on an emotional level what this picture looks like. So I either have to decide that these words don't apply to me or work to find room for them in my psyche. Add to that how these are words so tied up in my gender identification and how vast a time it's been where that's been a core thing. So not only do I not identify as beautiful, gorgeous, or lovely, but I felt and thought I couldn't ever be identified as those things. It's kind of a massive hump to get over, but It's something I know I have to deal with.
In other news, Magnets and Ladders published two of my short stories in their Fall/Winter 2021/22 issue. One of them, "Before the Fall", won their fiction category. They're at www.magnetsandladders.org and I like what they're doing.
One of my big concerns is that I'm not writing near as much short fiction. That may be because I'm writing massive novels right now. Holly and the Wizards is at 774 pages, and it's got a lot more ground to cover. But yesterday I was in a conversation on ZB about a band I like a whole lot, Porcupine Tree, and we were comparing them without their current drummer and after he joined them. So I heard one of their songs twice, and the first two lines grabbed my imagination. An hour later I had a story of around 1500 words, spell-checked, proofed, and edited multiple times. times. Okay, it's been more of an issue of what I've been focusing on. That's heartening. I'm running out of shorter length stuff to submit to Magnets and Ladders.
Speaking of creative endeavors, I've managed to do something I've been wanting to do for a while. I've got a song with echo parts built in, so they track with a change in speed and lock to the pulse of the song. But I've wanted something extra, so I've got them bouncing around in the stereo field, independent of each other, and it creates a nice cloud or halo effect where the tracks seem to surround the listener. This isn't what I thought it would sound like, but I consider it to be both a lucky accident and also appropriate to the track. And I love being able to play in this kind of sandbox.
It's all about creativity for me. I've figured out that creativity is one of the sexiest things to me, though it doesn't seem to show up in who I dated in the past. Of course that's been a touch over 18% of my life, so I may be forgetting some things about them.
So that's it in a nutshell. I have several things I want to post here, so it's a matter of writing them and getting them put up. Hope y'all are doing well.
Nyyki (she/her/Miss)
no subject
Date: 2021-12-05 04:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-12-06 03:56 am (UTC)I'd do that, but there's no way to get waivers for them so I can avoid getting sued by them.
All kidding aside, Louie in Molly and Me is based on Nappy, and there's some of Josi in Annie in the same book, though other dogs are blended in there as well. Fletcher is alluded to in Nicole's Revenge in an oblique way. Roscoe in Patricia's Story has some traits from my uncle's dog Ernie, and Muffin and Nugget in the Déjà vu books are based a lot on Sissy and Little Bit. In Love Spell Shelby is a close reflection of Guardian, while Jack is Nappy showing up again. In the incomplete novel (maybe, or maybe a novella) Indispensable Hevohaj isn't based on anyone, but in shorter works Charlie in A Dog in the Classroom is Nappy again, while Corky in "Quality Time" is based on a stray that showed up here who got named Jemma. She also is the basis for Zirra's dog Hershel in the romance novel I'm working on, Love Meme?, so she's showing up in multiple things, like Nappy. But I suspect Nappy will show up the most, because, duh, Napoleonus Maximus Rex Urso. He is, as we said back then, the bestest dog. Nyyki (She/her/Miss)
Damn girl
Date: 2021-12-06 05:10 am (UTC)Re: Damn girl
Date: 2021-12-06 05:25 am (UTC)Six novels completed so far, though still waiting to edit almost all of them, I count twelve novellas but I may be missing some, and around 135 short stories, almost all of them edited. I've got 148 things in my work in progress folder, and I'm still moving the "fix-up" soft apocalypse novel, Assed Out, along, though I know where it's going to end up. But writing stuff for Sheryl Foster is sort of a certain headspace, because that involves getting into excessive use of profanity and other blue language, plus some things that aren't considered to be socially acceptable. Oh, and that doesn't include the two ones I'm working on, Holly and the Wizards and Love Meme?, or the M:TA book called Holly's Return. (Different Holly, way different game system)
I sort of write a lot. I've also kind of been doing it for a while. Nyyki (she/her/Miss)