Types of Friends

There are many kinds of friends. Here are a few of the types. Friends can be of more than one of these types. See how many of these you have, and mention any that you think I missed.

 

Auxiliary Friend: This is a friend who hangs out with someone just because the people they usually hang with are unavailable at the moment. They never call unless everyone else is busy or unavailable, and they’re often the friends you run into. They like you, but they just don’t take the effort to connect.

 

Hit and Run Friend: This is the friend who comes by for an hour or so, talks for about ten minutes on the phone, sends a brief email every once in a while, but never spends any real time with you. They make you feel like they have more important things to do than to spend time with you.

 

Orbital Friend: This is someone who likes having people around them, but never really gets close to you. They spend a lot of time talking about themselves and their needs, but never seem to really care if you have any feelings of your own. You’re just a satellite to them.

 

Wah Friend: This is the kind of friend who is always in the middle of some personal crisis. They constantly complain to you about how bad their life is going. They seem to not care if you’re okay or not, because you’re just a support for their daily crisis.

 

True Friend: The saying goes, “Friends help you move, and true friends help you move bodies.” This is someone who will do anything for you that you need done. Often referred to as the “Four a M Friend.”

 

Unrequited Friend: This is someone you feel noting except friendship for, but you can tell that they have a serious case of the hots for you. They’re always hoping that the friendship will develop into something more.

 

Drama Friend: This type of friend is always ready to blow up at a waitperson to get a free meal, lose it at a sales clerk, or slam any and all people they meet. To call them high maintenance is a gross understatement. Everywhere they go, they’re the lead character in some kind of Neal Simon play on bad acid, where everyone is out to ruin their day and the friend is going to make them pay for it.

 

Friend in Law: This is someone that you know through someone else. You really have nothing in common with this person, with the exception of a mutual acquaintance. Conversations with this person can be awkward.

 

Casual Friend: This is someone that you never really get to know very well. Either through something in their nature or something in the interaction, you just can’t get past the superficial level with them.

 

Instant Friend: This is someone that you meet, and almost instantly you’re sharing your deepest personal details with them. It’s like you have known them since the fall of Atlantis.

SuperFriend: This is someone who seems to be able to do everything, always right there with whatever you need, always with the answer. Problem is, their answers are often not the right ones, but no amount of telling them so will get the point across.

 

Party Friend: This person is generally not someone that you like to hang around with, but they’re just the right person to go to parties, concerts, museums, and the like with.

 

Fighting Friend: This is a friend that you like to argue with. No matter how the conversation starts, eventually you’re going to get into a heated debate with this person. Often this is someone with very different political, cultural, or spiritual views from you.

 

Class Friends: This is a situational friend who you meet in a class or something similar. You’re pretty good friends with them while the class or other event lasts, but afterward, they fade away.

 

Flip Friend: This is a friend who is very close when you’re with them alone, but gets distant when someone else comes around. That someone can be either someone in particular, like someone they’re dating, or it can be anyone.

 

UnFriend: This is someone you hang around with, but you have absolutely no affinity for this person at all. Guys will often pick on this person, while women will gossip about them behind their back. This person is always the odd one in the group. There is no good reason for them to be in a group of friends, but still, there they are.

 

Pet Friend: This friend is more like a pet than a friend. You’re always taking care of them, making sure they’re okay, and helping them out of the messes they’ve gotten themselves into.

 

Checkers Friend: This friend starts out as a friend of a friend, but you soon become close friends and the person who introduced you gets left out in the cold, like what happens when you jump a piece in checkers.

 

Circus Friend: Just like the Circus, that comes to town every year, this friend keeps leaving and returning to your life, “for a limited engagement.” They’re around for a short time, you’re really busy with them, and then they go away and you know they’ll be back eventually.

 

Day Planner Friend: This is a friend who is always busy. You have to fight their crazy schedule to get together with them, and then you keep making plans with them. But don’t let one of those plans get skipped, because then you’ll have to fight to get a place on the schedule again.

 

Friend of the “Ex”: This person you met through an ex-relationship. This friend is friends with both of you still and so there are definite things you can’t discuss with them.

 

Ex’s Ex-Friend: This is a cross between the Friend of an Ex and the Checkers Friend. This person was the close friend of an ex-lover, and they came with you when the lover left your life. They now don’t talk with your ex, and often this is the result of the breakup or some other problem they have with your ex.

 

Token Friend: This is a friend that is the sole representative of some group that you don’t associate with. Some examples are Token Gay friend, Token Republican/Democrat friend, Token Single/married friend, and such.

 

Service Friend: This is a friend that is good at something you need in your life, and though you like them, you find yourself always asking for help on something. The most common friend of this type is someone who is computer savvy.

 

Geek Friend: This friend is someone that you have a niche interest with. Your other friends usually don’t have this interest, or at least, it’s not as deep as it is to you and this particular friend. This is often something the general public finds highly geeky.

 

Weird Friend: This is someone that is weird. That creepy kind of weird. They usually make their way into the group either because of some special knowledge or skill, or because people in the group feel sorry for them. They’re not so off kilter as to be certifiable, but the really odd stuff that comes out of their mouth often stops conversation dead in its tracks. They’re often socially inept, have problems with maintaining social space properly, and also may dress or groom themselves in unusual ways. (If at all)

 

Backpack Friends: These are people you like to be with, but they make no effort to maintain friendships with other people, either through a lack of socialization skills or due to a far too harsh standard for their friends. (These people are often loners) As a result, you find yourself carrying the friendship all the time like a backpack.

 

Lone Wolf Friends: These friends are dedicated to being the loner in society. They don’t understand friendship, and they often spend their time depressed and lonely without knowing why. They’re usually surprised when someone calls and asks them to join a group going out, and they might beg off. They’re often mystified about why people try to have them as friends.